meditation

Are you feeling bored and looking for that next high?

Would you like to shift from seeking to feeling fulfillment?

We live in a culture of desiring more and more. We’re encouraged to seek happiness in new relationships, exciting careers, fresh adventures, and material possessions. Esther Perel speaks to this modern phenomenon: where once we left jobs or relationships because we were unhappy, now we leave because we believe we could be happier.

But here’s the twist: the ecstasy you’re searching for isn’t hiding in external changes. As Margot Anand beautifully puts it:

“Ecstasy is already within you. You need not look for it outside.”

The truth is, living ecstatically isn’t about chasing adrenaline highs or peak experiences—it’s about awakening to the richness of what’s already here.

You may have heard that before. I had for years, and now I live it, knowing that at any moment, I can feel ecstatic. I can choose the way I feel and not need my environment to make me happy.

Why Routine Feels Anti-Ecstatic

Routines are the backbone of security, but they can stifle our creativity and desire. In relationships especially, routine can dull the spark, making life feel predictable and monotonous.

Variety, or the allure of “newness,” stirs our senses and awakens eros—the life force that fuels passion and vitality.

But before you rush to change everything, consider this:

What if newness doesn’t require leaving, changing, or escaping? What if it’s a shift in perception?

Here is an invitation to explore how this works.

Cultivate Newness: Rediscover the Moment

When was the last time you truly joined a moment with fresh eyes?

Imagine watching a movie you’ve seen before. One approach is to anticipate each scene, disengaged and half-bored. Another is to dive in, noticing subtle layers you missed before. Relationships, routines, and everyday life are no different.

“Life has limitless layers. The art is to live the exact moment a thousand times and see it as a unique experience.”

Here’s a practice to try:

Join Each Moment Exercise

  1. Pick an object in your home—a chair, a mug, or a plant.
  2. Pretend you’re seeing it for the first time.
  3. Observe its color, texture, and how light dances on its surface.
  4. Ask yourself: What’s new here?

When we bring this beginner’s mind to relationships and life, newness becomes abundant.

The Science of Newness

Did you know that novelty stimulates dopamine, the brain chemical linked to pleasure and motivation? This isn’t about chasing the new—it’s about breaking mental patterns that keep us stuck in autopilot.

Example: Think of a song you adore. You could listen to it a thousand times and still feel its magic. Why? Because your presence keeps it alive.

J.O.Y. – Join, Open, Yield

Living ecstatically invites us to:

  1. Join each moment: Let go of what you think you know.
  2. Open to the unexpected: Curiosity fuels connection.
  3. Yield to what’s here: Surrender the need for “better” and savor the now.

An Invitation to Awaken

Ecstasy doesn’t mean life is perfect—it means life is alive. You don’t need a new job, a different partner, or a bigger house to feel it. You need only to embrace this truth:

“You will never again be here. Every moment holds the promise of birth and death—a once-in-a-lifetime experience if we allow it.”

So, how will you meet this moment?

We invite you to watch our recent free masterclass:

>>>The Art of Ecstasy: 3 Steps to Transcend Routine

Move from mundane routines to a life rich with wonder, presence, and fulfillment.

We had the pleasure of being guests on the Super States: Practices of TRANCE-formation Podcast hosted by Joshua Peters.

In this episode, titled “Exploring Tantra for Personal Growth with Sara and Thomas Stout,” we delved into the transformative practices of Tantra and its profound potential for personal growth.

You can listen to the podcast episode here:

 

During our conversation with Joshua, we covered a range of topics that can offer valuable insights into Tantra and its benefits:

  • Understanding the essence of Tantra and its principles
  • Exploring SkyDancing Tantra and its unique approach
  • Discovering the three keys to ecstasy within Tantra
  • Unveiling the two fundamental tools of Tantra practice
  • Exploring how Tantra strengthens trust on multiple levels
  • Learning ways to initiate body-based practices for personal growth
  • Simple practices that invite more aliveness into your life
  • Exploring Tantra both individually and within the context of partnership
  • Guidance on determining if Tantra aligns with your personal journey

We believe this podcast episode serves as a valuable overview of Tantra for those curious about its potential.

As we reflect upon our recent weekend retreat, The Art of Loving: An Introduction to SkyDancing Tantra, we are deeply moved by the authenticity that permeated our time together. It warms our hearts to know that our students appreciated our commitment to authenticity. We didn’t expect that acknowledgment since it’s just who we are – a value that lies at the core of our shared journey.

Authenticity is the art of living without masks or pretenses, allowing our true selves to shine forth in all our rawness and vulnerability. It’s about embracing our humanness—the messy, imperfect, and beautifully flawed aspects of who we are—and finding beauty and strength in our authenticity.

Throughout our retreat and beyond, we’ve witnessed the transformative power of authenticity.

It’s in the moments of shared laughter and tears, the honest conversations that flow from the depths of our souls, and the genuine connections that form when we show up as our true selves.

In a world that often prizes perfection and conformity, authenticity is a radical act of self-love and self-acceptance. It’s about owning our stories, embracing our uniqueness, and finding liberation in our truth.

Authenticity is not about being unfiltered and rude.

Self-expression without sensitivity of impact is reactive and unaligned with your soul’s truth.

Authenticity isn’t always easy. It requires courage to show up as we are, even when it feels uncomfortable or vulnerable. But in embracing our authenticity, we create space for deeper connections, meaningful experiences, and profound growth.

“I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I found so much freedom, space, expansion, love, and acceptance, which allowed me to expand my love with myself and my partner. Thank you.“   Marc

Let’s welcome authenticity as the norm, inviting voices and expressions of our uniqueness.

It begins with each of us welcoming our contrary and unexpressed selves to be present. In this moment, the question that we inquire – What is my authentic self now?

My life, as I have known it, is unravelling, is shifting and transforming at lightning speed. This past month a confluence of circumstances has collided and had me spinning in a new direction. To where?

For 21 years, I felt stuck in a job that, while it fulfilled my obsessive need for security, it stifled my full expression and passion. For years I couldn’t figure out how to let go of the corporate trap of income and medical insurance.

This job has also limited my travel and Tantra studies. Even though I was a magician, arranging chunks of time away, it became increasingly harder to meet the ridiculous productivity and performance standards, and I cared too much. It sucked the creativity and ability to thrive from my bones.

September was a whirlwind. First, an expansive trip studying and teaching SkyDancing Tantra in France and Belgium. It was such an honor to teach alongside Margot Anand, the founder of SkyDancing Tantra.

Thomas and I celebrated our 30th anniversary and 10 years since we started studying Tantra.

We were home for four days before we jumped back on the plane to achieve my dream of teaching, what I consider, one of the most life-changing experiences available. Cycle 1 of the Love and Ecstasy Training cracked me open ten years ago. And since then, an excitement awoke within me that is hard to contain.

Teaching this course was delayed 1 1/2 years due to Covid, so we were more than ready to gather in this magnificent energy and community of people who wished to evolve through this healing journey.

At the end of the week, during the final sharing circle, Thomas was in tears listening to all the beautiful stories of openings people experienced. Mika, my co-leader, and I were thrilled teaching in a forum that nurtured face-to-face, heart-to-heart, loving connection.

I knew my life was about to shift again.

After great consternation about how to put the time, money, and energy into promoting our Love Passionately online Coaching business three days before the LET course started, I made a brave choice to invest significantly in this dream. I wasn’t sure how it would fit together, but I knew I was more worried it would not ever happen.

The next day, I unexpectedly received notice that because of Covid, I would no longer be working for that organization that had provided comfort with security and had also held me back. My security was unravelling.

I felt both relieved and in shock. I had been asking for the Universe to help me decide about this job and manifest my dreams, so here it was, I received a kick in the ass and an open door simultaneously.

My friend, Vicki, said, “Sara, You’re letting go of the side of the pool, aren’t you?” Yes, I am! Although it feels more like I let go of a pier as I set sail, freely out to sea.

I still have my private practice and had to decide not to load up that schedule. It would be too easy to continue the same pattern by leaving one job and exchanging for a similar over-commitment, holding on to security in exchange for fulfillment.

My life has revolved around this intense schedule for so many years; what will it be like to no longer have to say, I can’t because I have to go to work? My schedule is unravelling.

I had dreamed of this freedom for years, and it’s truly hard to believe it’s here. I feel excited and nervous, wondering how it will play out?

Can I trust the universe and all the signs that this is my true path?

During my manifestation meditation practice this week, instead of guiding the process with my scripted steps, I let my chakras and body lead. It was astonishing to witness my body unravelling and unwinding as it twisted and contorted, stretching and releasing years of tension. I was in awe, watching how my body knows how to heal itself when I give it space. 

My life is unravelling from the ties that bind it. As I handed my boss my computer and badge, I was surprised that the anxiety that I had imagined would be there all these years was completely absent. I feel so high with the excitement of what is possible; I am buzzing!

Unravelling must occur before we can shape the bow we desire.

Thomas and I launched our first couples coaching program and love seeing the smiles and yumminess as these couples discover new ways of being together.

What will come from this long-overdue freedom?

~ By Sara